Worst Pick Up Line

[BenGal_85cj]

Okay, so I just got back from a mini break with a co worker. I have no clue how this subject came up, but we were talking about the worst pick up lines ever used on us. So I thought it would be fun to hear other ones! Guys, if you don't have one that's ever been used on you, tell us one you've used to hit on a girl with! I'll start..........
I was 18, in college at a frat party. One of the brothers came up to me and said, "Is that a keg in your pants because I would really like to tap that a**!"
Worst one for me hands down.

[Joe from Florence]

how about this classic?
"I'm part german, French and Scottish.....would you like some scottish in you?"

[Turk88]

I have two...one of them has actually worked...you decide which one..

1. "Nice shoes wanna ****!!!" (i am sure you can figure out the last word)

2. "wanna go back to my place get some pizza and have orgasmic sex? " Then we she says no you ask "what, you don't like pizza?"

[BFan71]

"Can I buy you a drink so I look better?"

[BenGal_85cj]

I have two...one of them has actually worked...you decide which one..

1. "Nice shoes wanna ****!!!" (i am sure you can figure out the last word)

2. "wanna go back to my place get some pizza and have orgasmic sex? " Then we she says no you ask "what, you don't like pizza?"


Is #2 the one that worked? It would work on me................LOL!!!

[Turk88]

I have two...one of them has actually worked...you decide which one..

1. "Nice shoes wanna ****!!!" (i am sure you can figure out the last word)

2. "wanna go back to my place get some pizza and have orgasmic sex? " Then we she says no you ask "what, you don't like pizza?"


Is #2 the one that worked? It would work on me................LOL!!!


really??
Sooooooo wanna go back to my place...[;)] LOL
actually it was number one but maybe I should try number two!! LOL

[Jom112]

One of my friends told me the worst pickup line ever used on her. She was at a bar at one of those events where you meet other young professionals. This guys walks up to her and says:
"Hi I'm a Doctor"
She said that's nice and walked away. I think the line would have worked if he wasn't so blunt about it...

[Turk88]

Me: "Can I name one of your legs Chriastmas and the other New years?"
Her: "Why"
Me: "So I can drop in between the holidays!"

[Stat]

How do you like your eggs in the morning.. fertilised or not?

[bengal_fan_in_toronto]

How do you like your eggs in the morning.. fertilised or not?
[:D] holy smokes thats a bad one

[Bengalfan69]

Do you know what would look good on you?
What?
ME!!!

[Beaker]

I suffer from amnesia, do I come here often?
Your place or your place...because my place is a dump.
Youre so fine, you make me want to go out and get a job.
Those must be space pants...because your butt is out of this world.
Dont be so picky...Im obviously not.
Can you help me find my puppy...I think she went into this cheap motel room.
Let's go to my place and do the things Im gonna tell everyone we did anyway.
All those curves, and me with no brakes.
My name is beaker...thats so you'll know what to scream later.

[BenGal_85cj]

Me: "Can I name one of your legs Chriastmas and the other New years?"
Her: "Why"
Me: "So I can drop in between the holidays!"


You have good ones Turk!!! LOL!

[Joe from Florence]

Are you religious? because i am garunteed to make you scream God

[kywcat]

Your ankles would make great earings!

[kywcat]

While watching a woman walk...
Wish I had a swing like that in my back yard.

[BenGal_85cj]

Joe...yours was priceless. Nice!
You guys are really good at this.........LOL!

[Turk88]

Me: "Can I name one of your legs Chriastmas and the other New years?"
Her: "Why"
Me: "So I can drop in between the holidays!"


You have good ones Turk!!! LOL!


Thank you....and at one time or another I have actually tried them all out!

[Buckeyehitman]

Me: "Pardon me what time is it?"
She tells you
Me: "I knew you'd give me the time of day"

giggity giggity goo

[Turk88]

Me: "Wanna have my children?"
Her: "No"
Me :"well then wanna just practice"

[Turk88]

Let's face it. I'm hot, you're hot and we both know you got a crush on me. And really, who can blame you with a gorgeous face like this. So can I snatch a kiss or vice-versa (that is kiss a sna).

[BenGal_85cj]

I'm LMAO at these!!! These are hilarious!!!!!

[Turk88]

I am not done yet...I have plenty of these....this post was made just for me!!

Excuse me. My friend over there is a little embarrassed. She'd like your phone number. She wants to know where she can get a hold of me in the morning.

[Joe from Florence]

ok, here goes....i got several more
Let's make like a fabric softener and snuggle

If someone was to write a story about my life, the climax would be when I met you!

Is that top felt? [No] Would you like it to be?
Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?
Pardon me, are you in heat?!
Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy.
If you were a booger I'd pick you first.
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
This is a test of the emergency pick up line service. Beeeeeeeeeep. If you had been any less beautiful, you would have just heard a bad pick up line.
and my favorite........Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.

[BenGal_85cj]

ok, here goes....i got several more
Let's make like a fabric softener and snuggle

If someone was to write a story about my life, the climax would be when I met you!

Is that top felt? [No] Would you like it to be?
Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?
Pardon me, are you in heat?!
Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy.
If you were a booger I'd pick you first.
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
This is a test of the emergency pick up line service. Beeeeeeeeeep. If you had been any less beautiful, you would have just heard a bad pick up line.
and my favorite........Hi. I'm an astronaut, and my next mission is to explore Uranus.


This is the best one all day!!!!! LMAO!

[Beaker]

Thank you....and at one time or another I have actually tried them all out!
Such a catch...and yet still single. Go figure.

[SmallAxe]

Hey, baby...
Why don't you be my Dairy Queen , and I'll be your Burger King? You treat me right, and I'll give it to you, your way, right away.
Hey, baby...
So, can I put my thingy in your thingy?
Hey, baby...
Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

[yorkshirebengal]

me: did it hurt?
girl: what hurt?
me: when you fell from heaven!!!

thats the ultimate cheese
my personnal favourite....
oii love heres 10p! call your mum and tell her your not going home tonight!! lmao

nice legs! what time do they open?
nice blouse... it'd look great on my bedroom floor..!

[BenGal_85cj]

Well boys, I'm outta here! I'm on vacation for the rest of the week!! [:D] [B][<:o)]

I hope you all have a wonderful rest of the week and weekend!
Thanks for ALL of the lovely pick up lines............they were hilarious and made me laugh all day!
Talk to you Monday!

[kywcat]

You know when some guys start talking to girls they are looking to get a little sign, a little look, or a little smile. I'm just looking to get a little.

[philhos]

Girl, you must be Jamacain ... because ju-makin' me crazy!
You're eyes are bluer than the water in my toilet!
Baby, how'd you get through security? 'Cause you're the bomb!
You must be a bowl of Lucky Charms, 'cause, baby, you're magically delicious!
"Hi, I'm Mike Tomczak. Can I buy you a drink?" --- swear to God, it really happened to my wife. She claims it really was Mike Tomczak and I'm like what would Tomczak be doing in a club in Oakland on a Friday night hooking up with college chicks? (True story, only at the time my wife wasn't married to me - or anyone else).

[Buckeyehitman]

Lemme get up in them guts.

This one is used by Jason Mewes, the guy that plays Jay in the Kevin Smith movies.

[34inXXIII]

'Hi, I'm Ben Roethlisberger. Wanna go for a ride on my motorcycle?'

[oasiswr]

Hello ladies, my name is Ron Mexico---- you all don't mind having some crabs later tonight do ya? HAHA


Well I did hear one comment at one bar from a guy stating " Hey sweet cheeks---- are you lookin for a place to sit? Well look no further and have a seat on my face, it's open 24/7, Baby (then proceeds to do vulgar things with his tongue).

I used this once with splendid results. Excuse me miss, but I was wondering how do you get in those amazing hot jeans? And she states "well buy me a drink maybe I'll let you in them tonight". This usaully works with the female beer,tequila drinker crowd. If you try this with the wine drinkers they might just roll their eyes and walk away.

(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you comewith one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.

(Shout in a room full of women with your hands out then state) Free Mammary exams! Step right up free mammary exams!!!!

Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? (No.) Do you wanna go upstairs and talk.



Excuse me, but do you give head to strangers? No. Well, then,allow me to introduce myself.

I like your butt, can I wear it as a hat?

I'm Irish. Do you have anyIrish in you? Would you like some?

I've got a pimple on my butt, wanna see it?

Is that a tic-tac in your shirt pocket or are you just glad to see me?

There are 265 bones in the human body. How would you like one more?

How do you like your eggs in the morning fertilized or non-fertilized?

I was wondering if you wanted to play lion tonight,baby? If you do you can kneel on the floor and I'll throw ya some man meat all night your way.

Hi, I'm the new Milkman. Do you want it in the front or the back?

I heard this one from a couple once and the BF stated " Ohhh come on, you couldn't possibly get any more pregnate than you are right now".

Do you know the difference between a hamburger and a blow job? No! D'ya wanna do lunch?

Do you like short love affairs? I hate them. I've got all weekend.

I'd love you like a snowstorm: I'd give you 8 to 10 inches and you wouldn't be able to leave the house for 3 days.

Hello. I'm just doing a survey. How tall are you on your knees?

If you were aspirin, I would take you every four to six hours.

So, I'm not doing anything until 3:00pm tomorrow, you want to get out of here?

My Favorite

Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull your pocketsinside out....) Would you like to?



Bevis & Butthead pick up line

Uh, do you like come here often, huh huh. I said "come." HUH HUH

[bleedorange]

"Tonight is your lucky night. I am auditioning for my next ex-wife."

[deviant]

Okay, so I just got back from a mini break with a co worker. I have no clue how this subject came up, but we were talking about the worst pick up lines ever used on us. So I thought it would be fun to hear other ones! Guys, if you don't have one that's ever been used on you, tell us one you've used to hit on a girl with! I'll start..........
I was 18, in college at a frat party. One of the brothers came up to me and said, "Is that a keg in your pants because I would really like to tap that a**!"
Worst one for me hands down.

That is pretty bad... So far no woman has been able to resist my charm, and my pick up line. (It really works!! Chicks dig dudes that get to the point!)
Anyway, here are a couple sure fire hits!
1. Hey baby, wanna hump?
2. I can't stop staring at your chest, I am enthralled by your two best friends! Wanna come to my place?
3. That sweater of yours would look better on my floor.
4. I'll show you mine if you show me yours.
5. Would you mind getting naked for me?
6. (while carrying your camcorder) I work for Girls Gone Wild... you wanna get drunk, naked, and have it all on film?
7. You wanna come over to my house and do something you'll regret in the morning?
8. Would you like to take part in a psychological expirement?
9. Have you seen my baseball?
10. This one works, no woman in her right mind can resist... That shirt looks very becoming on you, of course if I was on you I'd be coming too![;)]

[Sexy B]

Worst one ever used on me:
Want to go home and compare naked body parts?

[Turk88]

Worst one ever used on me:
Want to go home and compare naked body parts?



yeah, sorry about that...I was a little drunk when I said that!! [:$]

[Turk88]

Me: "Can I smell your panties"
Her: "WHAT? Of course not!!!!"
Me: "Must be your feet then!"

[Sexy B]

If I had been sober enough to know it was you, Turk, it may have worked! LOL[;)]

[Bengal07]

If I told you,you had a beautiful body
would you hold it against me?

[Turk88]

If I told you,you had a beautiful body
would you hold it against me?



Ahhhh the classics!!!

[Turk88]

If I had been sober enough to know it was you, Turk, it may have worked! LOL[;)]



MAY HAVE??? WTF??? [:(]

[Bengal07]

If I told you,you had a beautiful body
would you hold it against me?


Well I'm a classic kinda guy! LOL

Ahhhh the classics!!!

[Turk88]

Yes you are my friend!!!

[Sexy B]

If I had been sober enough to know it was you, Turk, it may have worked! LOL[;)]



MAY HAVE??? WTF??? [:(]


Well, I didn't want to come off sounding too easy....

[deviant]

Your teeth are whiter than the porcelain of my toilet, what I wouldn't give to be your toothbrush!

--If you weren't the most stunningly beautiful woman I've ever seen I'd probably be giving you some cheesy pick up line to get you to talk to me...

-- (my redneck side may show up for a bit)... your smile is brighter than a million welding arcs
--- I've been spending so much time thinking of you I'm going blind
---- I think of you so much I'm getting callases where the blisters were
----- My girlfriend died ya know, she got hit by a truck and it chopped off her head.
------ My hand is nothing compared to you!
My personal favorite, and serious cheez ball of a line... it actually made a couple women blush (no ish!)......... Where did you hide them? She says "Hide what?"), you say... "Your wings... you are so beautiful you have to be an angel... so, where did you hide your wings?"

[Beaker]

My personal favorite, and serious cheez ball of a line... it actually made a couple women blush (no ish!)......... Where did you hide them? She says "Hide what?"), you say... "Your wings... you are so beautiful you have to be an angel... so, where did you hide your wings?"

That wasnt blushing...they were red-faced angry.

[Turk88]

Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room across the street.

[Jasonew6]

how about this classic?
"I'm part german, French and Scottish.....would you like some scottish in you?"

I think this would work better if you said Scotch instead of Scottish.

[Beaker]

I suffer from amnesia, do I come here often?
Your place or your place...because my place is a dump.
Youre so fine, you make me want to go out and get a job.
Those must be space pants...because your butt is out of this world.
Dont be so picky...Im obviously not.
Can you help me find my puppy...I think she went into this cheap motel room.
Let's go to my place and do the things Im gonna tell everyone we did anyway.
All those curves, and me with no brakes.
My name is beaker...thats so you'll know what to scream later.

I know you aspire to be like me Turk. You are learning well.

[Turk88]

WOW!!! Didn't even see that! Usually I just gloss over your posts anyway since they are usually full of nothing more than dribble!! [:O] [:D]

[Beaker]

WOW!!! Didn't even see that! Usually I just gloss over your posts anyway since they are usually full of nothing more than dribble!! [:O] [:D]
I thought you glossed over them because you had trouble with the big words.

[Turk88]

WOW!!! Didn't even see that! Usually I just gloss over your posts anyway since they are usually full of nothing more than dribble!! [:O] [:D]
I thought you glossed over them because you had trouble with the big words.


LOL..yeah, you and all your big words...like butt, babe, snake, hit, pass!!! [:D]

[Beaker]

WOW!!! Didn't even see that! Usually I just gloss over your posts anyway since they are usually full of nothing more than dribble!! [:O] [:D]
I thought you glossed over them because you had trouble with the big words.


LOL..yeah, you and all your big words...like butt, babe, snake, hit, pass!!! [:D]

I wasnt going to go as far as pointing out your difficulty with more than three letters...but the first step in overcoming a problem is taking ownership. Kudos to you Turk.

[Turk88]

At training camp I am holding you down, shaving off that orange mop and ....wait a minute...don't go getting all turned on now Beaker!!!

[Buckeyehitman]

"Women are like voltron, the more you add, the better it gets."

Not really a pick up line, but it's hilarious nevertheless.

[mcfarljd]

Just stare at the girls forehead until she asks what your doing then say

"oh i was just wondering what my belt buckle would look like up there"

[:D]

[Rayne]

That's a nice outfit you're wearing...it'll look great all balled up on my bedroom floor tomorrow morning.

[Steely_J]

Hey baby... the word of the day is "legs". What do you say we go back to my place and spread the word?

[oasiswr]

Well this might work if you find a girl who is a herpetologist.

I have a big snake and I was wondering if you would like to see it sometime ------- then tell me what kind of habitat it should dwell in also? [:D]

[Steely_J]

Do you believe in love at first site or do I have to walk by again?

[Jom112]

So can I buy you a drink? Or should I just give you the money...

[Joey]

Let me preface this by saying it was several years ago, I was a little tipsy, I was listening to my old roommate tell a story I heard a hundred times which always seemed to get a little further away from the truth he told it (as was often the case whenever he told a story), and I was feeling a little onry

Anywho, (and I don't suggest using this....) I turned to the girl next to me, and....

"Hey whats your name? (before she could answer) Whatever, it doesn't matter. Do you like sex? I like sex. We should have sex!

It was a definate show stopper! It totaly thru her for a loop. She just stared at me quizicaly for a second. I could tell she was trying to compute what I had just said, and actually considering it. Then she just said "What!?" and started laughing:) It seemed like it was a good ice breaker, but in all honesty I wasn't too interested in sleeping with her. Sometimes when I feel a little onry, I've been know to say some rather shocking things just because it amuses me to see peoples reactions;)

Another classic while we're on the topic...

I was at another bar, I believe I was still underage at the time. There was this cute older lady I can't recall her age, but she was up there. Anywho, I went and started talking to her and we were I was sitting at a booth with her and her two daughters who were in their 20's. Anywho me and the mom started kissing. We stopped kissing for a second and me in my immaturity looked at the two daughters and said "I just kissed you mom!"

That was another classic!

[Turk88]

Well this might work if you find a girl who is a herpetologist.

I have a big snake and I was wondering if you would like to see it sometime ------- then tell me what kind of habitat it should dwell in also? [:D]




You have been spending to much time with Beaker, this is the exact line he used on the waitress at Talegators...lmao