CLEAN funny pictures and jokes

[Bengalzona]

[Bengalzona]

[Bengalzona]

[Bengalzona]

http://www.salon.com/2013/01/30/death_by_cunnilingus/

Look, I do not relish making light of attempted murder. But sometimes you just need to write about a really crazy attempted murder.

A Brazilian woman has been accused of trying to kill her husband by putting poison in her ****** and asking him to have oral sex with her.

The intended victim — identified only as a 43-year-old man from Sao de Jose Rio Preto – knew something was going on when he noticed an unfamiliar odor coming from his wife’s freshly poisoned nether region.

But here’s the thing about vaginas, as this woman soon learned: They are very porous.

Realizing that his wife was probably absorbing a majority of the poison she had intended to kill him with, he brought her to the hospital and saved her life.

This guy! He is totally down to perform oral sex 24/7 and will generously rush you to the emergency room after you try to kill him. And they say chivalry is dead!

But he is nobody’s fool: Sources reveal the man intends to sue his wife for attempted murder.

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[Orange and Black Attack]

[Bengalzona]

[BengalYankee]

[Bengalzona]

[Bengalzona]

[Bengalzona]

[Jabberwocky]

Originally Posted by BengalYankee

Oh, my! Mah-my, Mah-mah my, my, my!

[Bengalzona]

[Bengalzona]

[XenoMorph]

[pookdogg7]

[XenoMorph]

Originally Posted by pookdogg7

Cocker Spaniel?

[Jabberwocky]

Originally Posted by pookdogg7

Originally Posted by XenoMorph

Cocker Spaniel?

Golden Retriever puppy.

[BengalYankee]

[Jasonew6]

Originally Posted by XenoMorph

Cocker Spaniel?

[Bengalzona]

Federal Bureau of Investigation
Intelligence Field Unit
J. Edgar Hoover Building
935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW Washington, D.C.



URGENT ATTENTION: BENEFICIARY


I AM SPECIAL AGENT MARK A. MORGAN FROM THE FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION (FBI) INTELLIGENCE UNIT, WE HAVE JUST INTERCEPTED AND CONFISCATED TWO (2) TRUNK BOXES AT JFK AIRPORT IN NEW YORK, AND ARE ON THE VERGE OF MOVING IT TO OUR BUREAU HEADQUARTER.


WE HAVE SCANNED THE SAID BOXES, AND HAVE FOUND IT TO CONTAIN A TOTAL SUM OF $4.1 MILLION AND ALSO BACKUP DOCUMENT WHICH BEARS YOUR NAME AS THE RECEIVER OF THE MONEY CONTAINED IN THE BOXES, INVESTIGATIONS CARRIED OUT ON THE DIPLOMAT WHICH ACCOMPANIED THE BOXES INTO THE UNITED STATES HAS IT THAT HE WAS TO DELIVER THIS FUNDS TO YOUR RESIDENCE AS PAYMENT WHICH WAS DUE YOU FROM THE OFFICE OF FEDERAL GOVERNMENT OF NIGERIA FROM UNPAID CONTRACT SUMS.



WE CROSS-CHECKED ALL LEGAL DOCUMENTATION IN THE BOXES, AND WERE ABOUT TO RELEASE THE CONSIGNMENT TO THE DIPLOMAT,WHEN WE FOUND OUT THAT THE BOXES IS LACKING ONE VERY IMPORTANT DOCUMENTATION WHICH AS A RESULT, THE BOXES HAS BEEN CONFISCATED.



ACCORDING TO SECTION 229 SUBSECTION 31 OF THE 1991 CONSTITUTION IN TAX PAYMENT, YOUR CONSIGNMENT LACKS PROOF OF OWNERSHIP CERTIFICATE FROM THE JOINT TEAM OF THE IRS AND HOMELAND SECURITY, AND THERE FOR, YOU MUST CONTACT US FOR DIRECTION ON HOW TO PROCURE THIS CERTIFICATE, SO THAT YOU CAN BE RELIEVED OF THE CHARGES OF EVADING TAX WHICH IS A PUNISHABLE OFFENSE UNDER SECTION 12 SUBSECTION 441 OF CONSTITUTION ON TAX EVASION.


YOU ARE THEREFORE REQUIRED TO GET BACK TO ME ON THIS EMAIL {agmarkamorgan01@superposta.com} WITHIN 72HOURS, SO THAT I WILL GUIDE YOU ON HOW TO GET THE NEEDED DOCUMENT. FAILURE TO COMPLY WITH OUR DIRECTIVE MAY LEAD YOU INTO PROBLEM, YOU WILL BE ARRESTED, INTERROGATED AND PROSECUTED IN THE COURT OF LAW FOR MONEY LAUNDERING.

WE MAY ALSO GET THE FINANCIAL ACTION TASK FORCE ON MONEY LAUNDERING (FATF) INVOLVED IF YOU DO NOT FOLLOW OUR INSTRUCTIONS. YOU ARE ALSO ADVISED NOT TO GET IN CONTACT WITH ANY BANK IN AFRICA, EUROPE OR ANY OTHER INSTITUTION, AS YOUR FUND ARE HERE NOW IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.


YOURS IN SERVICE
Agent Mark A. Morgan
Regional Director
Federal Bureau of Investigation
E-mail: agmarkamorgan01@superposta.com

[BengalYankee]

[BengalYankee]

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[Bengalzona]

[pookdogg7]