Should I Be More Sensitive...................

[BengalbobZilla]

Originally Posted by Wingnut

One third of the world's population would disagree with you.

If they aren't a Levitical Jew, it doesnt apply to them

[fredtoast]

Originally Posted by WhoDeyJon

Phil 2:3b ...in humility count others more significant than yourselves, unless you are killing them all to take their land

Fixed it for you.

[urinalcake]

not sure what you mean by down the 'drug path', but i'll try to chime in with my $.02 here

i've had a couple of friends go down the 'drug' path... deep, deep down said path. noticed that in a lot of instances these were self absorbed, needy dudes and their addictions only magnified those traits to a greater extent. then they ended up using the addiction as a sympathy crutch, 'oh woah is ME, im an addict. you don't know how hard MY life is.... can i borrow $40?' not saying this is the case with your buddy, but i've seen it happen. in your buddy's 'not funny' responses to your FB post kind of seem like an attempt to glean the sympathy of others who know your shared situation, garner a 'oh, he's still depressed about that' reaction from others. think about it, what is the point of even commenting? if other people thought it was funny, just let it be. does he go through every post that comes up on his feed and grade the level of hilariousness? nope. that may sound overly harsh, but again, i've lived it and that's what i've taken away.

that being said, i do think you need to talk with your buddy. regardless of how selfish or misguided his reactions to the way you deal with this stuff are, he's still a friend and i'm sure you want the best for him. let him know how you feel, that this is the way you deal with it and that he needs to accept that. try to help him with the addiction as much as you can without negatively impacting your own life. this will be the toughest part. accept him, try to help him, but don't coddle him.

and just to be 100% clear, don't censor yourself. its what makes you. personally i've become a big fan of the way you tie it into your voice here on these boards, sure others would agree.

[fredtoast]

Brad, it is difficult to advise you on this because the relationship between you and your friend is very complex. There are obviously lots of issues between the two of you, and I think what you are describing as his attitude toward the crash is actually part of a much bigger problem.

Have a talk with him about All the issues between you two. Many people make big deals out of something small when it is really something else bothering them. Any married person will tell you this. The big blow up over a dirty plate left on the counter usually is about something else altogether.

[Packerbacker09]

Originally Posted by bradfritz21

to the passenger from my wreck (best friend at the time)? He still has troubles coping (never has been able to cope since the wreck and got into drugs to deal with it all), he gets all upset at a lot of what I do, and still struggles with everything.

In example: I made a post during the National Title Game on Facebook that said "Te'o is about as relevant in this game as I am in a tree-dodging contest."

(We hit a tree in our wreck, for anyone that doesn't know the story.)

Everybody else thinks it's hilarious.

He gets all upset and replies to it with a few things and just said "not funny."

He's done that when I've made a few jokes like that. Life's too short to get caught up in all that and to be all upset at something that we can't change.

Don't get me wrong, seeing me hurt had to be hard when I was sitting right behind him, but he walked away from it UNSCATHED....................... not even a bruise.

I guess what I'm asking is should I consider him when I want to make coments like that and should I tailor my life to make sure that he's ok with it? Seems far-fetched, but do I stop being me to make sure that I don't upset him?

Never stop being you. I would try to talk to him one on one.

[rfaulk34]

Originally Posted by SteelCitySouth

Especially this one...I mean look how numb his skull is...

Don't squeeze so hard and the skull will not get numb.

[bradfritz21]

Originally Posted by BengalsFan024

just to be clear when your saying Drugs your not talking about pot are you

Because thats not a drug.

lol, no, I'm not that stupid.

I'm talking like hardcore stuff: X, other pills, and such.

Originally Posted by duke0476

Talk to your friend and explain to him that this is how you have learned to cope with what happened. Everyone copes in certain ways and this is just yours.

If he is having issues coping than he needs to see someone. Most people do not realize that it is not always about "getting over" or "forgetting" about an event, it is learning to find ways to cope with the event.

For some it may be jokes with others it may be breaking down and crying on a regular basis. None is better or worse than the other they are just different ways for people to process or cope with a traumatic event.

If you cope with it by cracking jokes or being funny or doing your presentations than it would only be detrimental to you to stop using these coping mechanisms.

It's not about coping, and that's what some people on here aren't getting. It's just me finding it funny to joke about. My best explanation is it's like shock joking where you're like "holy ****, I can't believe he just said that." Do you know what I mean? Like when you see girls with their hands over their mouths but their mouths are open and they're laughing. Most people that know me laugh, not because of shock, just because it's a funny concept to think about.

What happened happened, and it's stupid to make everyone walk around on egg shells all day and act like I'm some victim, and it's just my personality to have no filter and take things to the extreme.

Originally Posted by urinalcake

not sure what you mean by down the 'drug path', but i'll try to chime in with my $.02 here

i've had a couple of friends go down the 'drug' path... deep, deep down said path. noticed that in a lot of instances these were self absorbed, needy dudes and their addictions only magnified those traits to a greater extent. then they ended up using the addiction as a sympathy crutch, 'oh woah is ME, im an addict. you don't know how hard MY life is.... can i borrow $40?' not saying this is the case with your buddy, but i've seen it happen. in your buddy's 'not funny' responses to your FB post kind of seem like an attempt to glean the sympathy of others who know your shared situation, garner a 'oh, he's still depressed about that' reaction from others. think about it, what is the point of even commenting? if other people thought it was funny, just let it be. does he go through every post that comes up on his feed and grade the level of hilariousness? nope. that may sound overly harsh, but again, i've lived it and that's what i've taken away.

that being said, i do think you need to talk with your buddy. regardless of how selfish or misguided his reactions to the way you deal with this stuff are, he's still a friend and i'm sure you want the best for him. let him know how you feel, that this is the way you deal with it and that he needs to accept that. try to help him with the addiction as much as you can without negatively impacting your own life. this will be the toughest part. accept him, try to help him, but don't coddle him.

and just to be 100% clear, don't censor yourself. its what makes you. personally i've become a big fan of the way you tie it into your voice here on these boards, sure others would agree.

I appreciate the highlighted part and the advice.

It's been going on for 13 years and I just don't think that there's any coming back for him. I've tried to help him and be around him and comfort him and tell him that he doesn't need to worry but he's such a head case and so caught up in self-pitty that he doesn't hear it.

The driver's worse: I forgave him in person two and a half years after only to have him try and screw us in the civil suit against the cemetery. Few years ago, he goes to jail (drugs, DUIs, etc.), we get awarded 8 mil in the civil suit but don't get any of it because a judge let his parents out of the case (I won't get into why because it's illegal to say my thoughts), but I forgave him when he got out of jail and told him we should start over, which he was all for. Then, he tries to kill himself, fractures his skull, ribs, breaks both legs, other injuries, says he was doing it for me, and he hopes I'm happy. Needless to say, I'm done trying to help him and done forgiving him. I don't hate him or feel bad for him because I don't need that in my life, so he's nothing to me.

[WhoDeyJon]

Not taking responsibilty for ones self and blaming others for your misery is what is pathetic.

Your attitude is what's wrong with this country. It's everyone elses fault. Not yours!

I never once said it was Brad's fault. Don't make stuff up.

People need to stop blaming others and take responsibilty for themselves.

Never argued otherwise.

His friend needs therapy. But maybe if his friend was thinking of someone other than himself, then he wouldn't need therapy, maybe.

His friend needs to sit down and talk with Brad. What I said from the very beginning.

[Wingnut]

Originally Posted by BengalbobZilla

If they aren't a Levitical Jew, it doesnt apply to them

1. I was being facetious. I thought that was obvious while discussing sacrifices.

2. I thought you were referring to the Bible as a whole, not just Leviticus.

3. WhoDeyJon wrote he was giving Biblical advice. Leviticus is part of the Bible, correct?

4. I can't keep up with which parts of the Bible Christians claim applies to them and which parts don't apply to them. Ask ten Christians and you'll get ten different answers.

[RumbleCat]

Originally Posted by SteelCitySouth

Of the hand to mouth, one lose often the soup!!!

lol

[neek]

Originally Posted by BengalbobZilla

If they aren't a Levitical Jew, it doesnt apply to them

I clicked on the last page of this, saw the word "jew", and I instantly knew who's post it was.

[RumbleCat]

Every thread, no matter the original topic. EVERY thread slides to drugs, religion, and politics. brad starts a thread about his accident, and off we go into the methods of cocaine production.

I love this place. People pay for this kind of entertainment.

[crispy]

Originally Posted by bradfritz21

lol, no, I'm not that stupid.

I'm talking like hardcore stuff: X, other pills, and such.

It's not about coping, and that's what some people on here aren't getting. It's just me finding it funny to joke about. My best explanation is it's like shock joking where you're like "holy ****, I can't believe he just said that." Do you know what I mean? Like when you see girls with their hands over their mouths but their mouths are open and they're laughing. Most people that know me laugh, not because of shock, just because it's a funny concept to think about.

What happened happened, and it's stupid to make everyone walk around on egg shells all day and act like I'm some victim, and it's just my personality to have no filter and take things to the extreme.


I appreciate the highlighted part and the advice.

It's been going on for 13 years and I just don't think that there's any coming back for him. I've tried to help him and be around him and comfort him and tell him that he doesn't need to worry but he's such a head case and so caught up in self-pitty that he doesn't hear it.

The driver's worse: I forgave him in person two and a half years after only to have him try and screw us in the civil suit against the cemetery. Few years ago, he goes to jail (drugs, DUIs, etc.), we get awarded 8 mil in the civil suit but don't get any of it because a judge let his parents out of the case (I won't get into why because it's illegal to say my thoughts), but I forgave him when he got out of jail and told him we should start over, which he was all for. Then, he tries to kill himself, fractures his skull, ribs, breaks both legs, other injuries, says he was doing it for me, and he hopes I'm happy. Needless to say, I'm done trying to help him and done forgiving him. I don't hate him or feel bad for him because I don't need that in my life, so he's nothing to me.

You guys had a civil suit against the cemetery? I thought you said this was a result of the driver racing through the cemetery?

[bradfritz21]

Originally Posted by crispy

You guys had a civil suit against the cemetery? I thought you said this was a result of the driver racing through the cemetery?

It was, but the cemetery was supposed to be locked at eight, but instead they let us party back there, drink (we were only 15), and just run wild back there. One reason that it's supposed to be locked is so that people can't drive back there because the roads are very narrow and it's pitch black.

The driver had driven back there before and so had the caretaker's son and other kids without their license, so we knew we could bring beer back there and he wouldn't care about us driving (there was a party going on, which he always let us party because everybody's dead so nobody cared).

In the trial, kids testified that they came in and told him that we had the car and he admitted that he knew he could have stopped the driver but chose not to.

The reason that we took a car there is because it's just up the road and we couldn't carry the beer, but we knew that we wouldn't get in trouble if we took the car.

There's a lot more to it than even that, but that should give you at least some idea.

[neek]

Originally Posted by RumbleCat

Every thread, no matter the original topic. EVERY thread slides to drugs, religion, and politics. brad starts a thread about his accident, and off we go into the methods of cocaine production.

I love this place. People pay for this kind of entertainment.

Wait, you know how to do this? PM me Scarface.

[urinalcake]

Originally Posted by bradfritz21

The driver's worse: I forgave him in person two and a half years after only to have him try and screw us in the civil suit against the cemetery. Few years ago, he goes to jail (drugs, DUIs, etc.), we get awarded 8 mil in the civil suit but don't get any of it because a judge let his parents out of the case (I won't get into why because it's illegal to say my thoughts), but I forgave him when he got out of jail and told him we should start over, which he was all for. Then, he tries to kill himself, fractures his skull, ribs, breaks both legs, other injuries, says he was doing it for me, and he hopes I'm happy. Needless to say, I'm done trying to help him and done forgiving him. I don't hate him or feel bad for him because I don't need that in my life, so he's nothing to me.

Wow. Just wow. Sounds very close to what I was attempting to illustrate in my original post. Takes a big person to handle what you describe here the way you are. Don't think I'd be able to do the same. That's something you can hang your hat on...

[BengalbobZilla]

Originally Posted by neek

I clicked on the last page of this, saw the word "jew", and I instantly knew who's post it was.

my point is still true and valid, i got nothin against the jews, i like their bagels

but in seriousness, my point still holds water that Leviticus doesn't have a hold on anyone

[XenoMorph]

Originally Posted by RumbleCat

Every thread, no matter the original topic. EVERY thread slides to drugs, religion, and politics. brad starts a thread about his accident, and off we go into the methods of cocaine production.

I love this place. People pay for this kind of entertainment.

Its this damn attention span of mine....

So does anyone watch wipeout?

[Wingnut]

Originally Posted by BengalsFan024

Its this damn attention span of mine....

So does anyone watch wipeout?

It's hilarious.

Although MXC Most Extreme Eliminations is way funnier.

[XenoMorph]

Originally Posted by Wingnut

It's hilarious.

Although MXC Most Extreme Eliminations is way funnier.

holy crap is that still on?

I still remember the episode where they dressed them up as squirrels and threw giant acorns at them..

the Nut puns never stopped

[BengalbobZilla]

Originally Posted by Wingnut

It's hilarious.

Although MXC Most Extreme Eliminations is way funnier.

MXC FTW

[urinalcake]

Originally Posted by BengalsFan024

So does anyone watch wipeout?

Just want to go on record and state that I would absolutely dominate if I were a contestant. All these goofballs get on there and just want to show off their quirky personalities. I'd be a stone cold opponent the likes of which they've never seen. Just want to let everyone know.